r/bald • u/HappyMacaron2724 • 18h ago
Hairloss May I join you?
I come humbly before the council to present myself to hopefully be accepted by the bald community. HLH, dialysis, and chemo have done a number on my head.
Also, open to advice on how to take care of a bald head. Washing, oiling, etc. Ty!
Edit: I can't even put into words how all of you have made me feel. I wasn't ready for the overwhelming love and kindness. This community is sublime.I love you all. Thank you everyone
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u/WomanWalking 18h ago
You have absolutely beautiful eyes, and the new look really brings those out š
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u/fondledbydolphins 17h ago
Total old person comment here: Look at how healthy her skin is in the last picture. Smooth, stretchy and glossy... lucky, even during chemo.
Hang in there
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u/Dickgivins 15h ago
Occasionally Iāll want to tell a woman she has great skin, but I only ever say it if I know her really well because I donāt wanna sound like a serial killer haha.
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u/ghreyboots 13h ago
"You have great skin, what kind of products do you use?" Makes it sound like you're looking for a skincare routine and not a face transplant.
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u/Bug_Lady23 13h ago
I had a guy working at McDonald's tell me he liked my skin. I try to avoid that one now since I'm afraid he's going to skin me. So saying someone has great skin is fine, saying you like someone's skin is kind of creepy.
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u/JustHereForCookies17 12h ago
IDK if you're even looking for ways to phrase it, but something like "Your skin is GLOWING/SO GLOWY!" would work.
Note: "You're glowing!" is usually a pregnancy-related comment and should be avoided at all costs.Ā However, fireflies & lightning bugs SHOULD be complimented on their luminosity.Ā
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u/Dickgivins 12h ago
Ah I appreciate the suggestion and the one u/ghreyboots gave as well.
Honestly though, as a somewhat large adult man I usually only compliment women on their physical appearance if theyāre already my friend or if theyāve given me clear signals that theyāre open to me flirting with them. Just easier for things not to get misinterpreted that way.
Otherwise I may compliment their shoes, accessories or just something not appearance related at all if itās a woman I donāt really know.
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u/JustHereForCookies17 11h ago
100% fair.Ā As a smaller woman, thank you for being cognizant of how things can feel for us, even if it's not how you mean them.
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u/punkminkis 3h ago
Now I just got a one-panel comic idea, of a pregnant firefly being told she's glowing
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u/OpalLaguz 10h ago
Compliment a person's "complexion" rather than their "skin" for a less Buffalo Bill effect
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u/RisingApe- Hair Headed - Woman 9h ago
Itās fine as long as you donāt say it creepy like āssskinnnnā
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u/_pachysandra_ 17h ago
And IMPECCABLE skin!!
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u/RainingBlood398 15h ago
100%!!! Going through all that and still having beautiful glowing skin, girls got some kinda superpower.
Absolutely slaying this look. 10/10 stunner.
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u/linds360 16h ago
Seconding this! I didnāt really notice them in the first photo, but canāt miss them in the 3rd.
Truly beautiful.
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u/pennhead 14h ago
I agree! I didnāt notice in the ābeforeā pic, but she has such a perfect nose!
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u/gobblewonkergrump 18h ago
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u/FormatMonster 16h ago
Excellent skull shape!
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u/UranusIsPissy 14h ago
I agree. She kinda looks like my fiancƩe, so I guess this is what I have to look forward to if she loses the curly hair that she'd keep sitting on if she straightened it. I love long hair, but I could easily live with this.
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u/ThoughtGuy79 18h ago
Well it sucks that you got here the way you did but you are always welcome. And you you look great bald.
I wash mine with my wife's face soap and then just apply a bit of lotion daily.
If you're going to be outside for an extended period, use SPF or keep it covered. You do not want a sunburned scalp.
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u/Uncle_Yoba 17h ago
>You do not want a sunburned scalp
Amen. I didn't even realize mine was sunburned until I took a scalding hot shower the next morning. That surprise "OUCH!!!" is seared into my memory.
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u/OpusAtrumET 16h ago
The fact my hair is thin enough that I already know this might be my sign...
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u/Vintage-Card-Man 15h ago
Dude, my scalp involuntarily twitched while reading that. You never forget.
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u/catwhisperer77 17h ago
Is wife just finding out now? š -jk
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u/ThoughtGuy79 17h ago
He he he .... It's been many years. She keeps it in the shower and one day forever ago when I was shaving, I decided to try it. It really helped so I just kept using it. I shave in the shower anyway so it is convenient. Right after I shave, I lather up dome with her face soap and then clean the rest of me. After at least a year or two, she commented as she was telling me what she needed from the store that she could not figure out why her soap seemed to run out so fast. I'd assumed she knew but she was just wondering for years where her soap disappeared to! š¤
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u/UranusIsPissy 14h ago
Soap is a lot more interesting than many people (especially straight men) think. Different kinds are good for different things. You'd want pretty much the opposite kinds of soap for a delicate bald scalp and for a mechanic's oily calloused hands, and you can easily have both at once. Excess oil (Carefully chosen for moisturising properties. Cocoa butter and coconut oil are good.) and added glycerin are good for the delicate skin, but (Very slightly. Too much will really wreck your skin, and could even be dangerous!) excessive alkali and added abrasive substances are good for the oily hands.
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u/PimpGameShane 16h ago
Lol you absolutely do not. In my black skin arrogance, I wrongly assumed my melanin would be a sufficient guard against the Miami sun. The next morning after a lovely shower, I dried my bald head with a white towel and the towel looked like I rubbed it in dirt. I was like, wtf is this?? To my horror, it was my peeling skin. My head looked like a leopard. Lol
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u/UranusIsPissy 14h ago
Recently bald? Black people can get sunburn, but it usually takes a lot to do it. Skin that's not been exposed to sunlight much is extra vulnerable. Black people should use sunscreen more, too. Melanin might give you some protection from sunburn, but it doesn't make you immune to skin cancer. It mostly just takes away the signs of that danger. Ask a black doctor if you really want to know about all that, though. I'm just a random white guy, and not especially knowledgeable about these things.
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u/achello Bald - Man 18h ago
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u/thatweirdsomeone Hair Headed - Woman 18h ago
girl you are gorgeous
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u/Sorry-Editor-3674 17h ago
Right?? Such a beautiful face, this really suits her!!!
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u/CurtisSeaflush 17h ago
Wish my head shape was that nice
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u/Familiar_Radish_6273 17h ago
I am not bald nor likely to be soon, but now and then I come on this sub just to remind myself that humans can be nice and sweet and generous. Everyone here is always so unbelievably kind and friendlyš„ŗ
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u/AverageAtBest55 16h ago
I sent one of my sons a screen cap of a guy who looked very much like him, especially the hairline. My son was like, "Mom, why are you on the Reddit bald sub?" I said because it is a great place that makes me have faith in humanity, and I love the reveals!
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u/Just_another_jerk__ 16h ago
Even if you dont think the outside is great the inside seems mighty awesome and that's what truly matters!!
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u/Critical_Wrap5617 18h ago
What a great shaped head. You look damn good.Ā
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u/No_Dot4055 14h ago
Somehow, this style really suits her.
I would consider to keep it even after Chemo. Combined with a slightly alternative outfit, a bit darker makeup on the eyebrows, it would work really well.
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u/-Jasked- 18h ago
Sorry about your situation but looks great on you! Welcome and well wishes to you on your health journey! šš¼
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u/Texan2020katza 18h ago
Respectfully, it looks really good on you and a married, straight woman I have this to say.
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u/findom_pixie 18h ago
I'm waiting for this post to get like a million upvotes. Girl, you look amazing! Chin up!
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u/g0jira54 18h ago edited 6h ago
Sunscreen on your head is a must. You want your scalp to match your face in tone, and it soon will, but don't burn yourself. Don't forget the ear area! I know this all isn't what you wanted but you do look good and you can accentuate your features with different styles of makeup and earrings instead of fixing your hair in different styles. You got this, all of it!
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u/mission-vitality 18h ago
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u/Reversion603 18h ago
Why does it look like she's welcoming a young Vladimir Putin?
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u/Interesting_Care_377 17h ago
Why can you recognize young Vladimir Putin by the back of his head? Bit suspicious, eh? š¤Ø
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u/sohcordohc 17h ago
Is that Demi Moore? And the girl from the black swan? It looks like both of them literally.
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u/DocHavelock 18h ago
Witch Hazel is a miracle for preventing bumps, I use it religiously as an aftershave
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u/TrippyShip Bald Watcher š 18h ago
I really liked using bio-oil to keep my dome moisturized and it absorbs great. Sunscreen sunscreen sunscreen. I didnāt have to worry about shaving (chemo) so I leave that to others. Be careful bc some heavier moisturizers can give you head zits and thatās just unnecessary fuckery. I also used a light exfoliating cream cleanser about every 3 days.
I will say I enjoyed having my head as art space - henna, scarves, hats, glasses etc. it was so easy to care for and to change up my look.
Welcome! Enjoy! Still my most favorite āhaircutā though my head hair has re-grown (no eyebrows tho!) - love seeing the other ladies of this sub
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u/DoubleNickle67 18h ago
Embrace the bald. Smile. Youāve overcome a massive hurdle. Be proud. Be bald. Be beautiful! You did it! Confidence is coming back and ya donāt even realize it! Chemo destroyed my facial hair. But my white beard came back salt and pepper. Bonus!
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u/Spirited_Touch7447 Hair Headed - Woman 18h ago
Free yourself! Shave it! You absolutely do not need it. You are gorgeous!
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u/Vegetable-Maximum445 18h ago
Brave - Bold - Beautiful. Just wanted to say that even with hair AND makeup - I canāt hold a candle to you! And youāre not even showing your smileā¦
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u/erinnananana 17h ago
Iām a bald gal thatās been bald since birth (genetic disorder) and I know itās not the same as what youāre going through, but know that we are in this together nonetheless!
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u/medlilove 18h ago
You look so good! Youāre features are very Elven (LotR style)
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u/Legitimate_Error_400 18h ago
Love it! You look great! For care advise, I wash my head with whatever soap is within arms reach
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u/OverRice2524 17h ago
Girl - those eyebrows rock!Ā
I wish you a healing journey and send you hugs! Just got done with chemo myself a few months ago. Cancer sucks.
I used lots of castor oil. Use it at night and on your eye brows and eyelashes. I got lots of little sores on my scalp. Castor oil helps and it's cheap.
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u/chrisschini 17h ago
I'm sorry to hear about your struggles and hope you can get better. But, in the meantime, you look fantastic.
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u/Sure_Tie_7093 17h ago
I think you are just beautiful. The new look suits you, so please don't think twice about it. I know you are going to get some great advice on washing, oiling, etc; you may end up wanting to keep it this way. Wishing you the best, and may each day be better than the one before. Take care!
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u/therethenherenow 17h ago
Iām really sorry that youāre going through this but the shaved makes you look younger/ healthier. I have to imagine that it is a significant loss that youāre experiencing with this part of your outward identity but be glad that you have a pretty face, one that is actually easier to focus on without the hair that was hanging on
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u/HurricaneHallene 17h ago
Wow you have such beautiful eyes! I feel like Bambi is staring into my soul
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u/LadyBlue347 15h ago
Iām sorry I donāt have any advice for you, but I saw the sadness in your eyes and had to stop and say this to you, with total sincerity:
You are lovely. You have beautiful eyes, pretty bone structure, nice skin, and Iām betting a delightful smile when youāre feeling better. You are a survivor. You are so brave. You have kicked a LOT of ass. And you are not your hair. It must have been so hard to let go of, and equally hard not to see yourself so differently now, especially with the pressure society puts on women. But it is not you. You are the steady warrior beneath the changing surface and nothing can take that from you.
Hang in there. Iām wishing you all the best and all the healing. Youāre doing great.
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u/pierogi_waystation 15h ago
Youāve shaved your head and now you are ready for the warpath! You will dominate this disease, and if you havenāt fallen in love with the look, you can just regrow your hair.
Please please please enjoy showering without having to clear the drain twice!
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u/Top_Snow6034 15h ago
Well hundreds of comments later if you see this: welcome! You look great. Sincerely. Itās a clean confident look. It makes you look younger even.
I wash my scalp with sun bum detox scalp scrub. Feels good, smells great, cruelty free.
After I wash with the scalp scrub I then shave with a dollar shave club razor and shave butter for translucent accuracy.
Moisturizing after shave in the evening or I use my zero shine 2.0 matte cream to reduce head shine if thatās your preference before going out or to work if I shaved in the morning.
Make sure you sunscreen if out during the day! They make matte sunscreens I believe. I love how it feels all cleaned up after a good shave. Itās a simple luxury I do every other day.
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u/No-Drag-7142 15h ago
Ready for some gentle C&C?
Give us a big smile picture! A lot of these r/bald posts are like 5% hair change and 95% visual confidence.
Looks great!
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u/kotakins989 14h ago
From one cool bald woman to another welcome. I also lost my hair to illness. I've learned life is easier without it so I keep shaved. I got this sick tat to reclaim my head (intracranial hypertension) when I went to remission. You've got this.
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u/beeskneessidecar 12h ago
Hang in there, it grows back. Sending you lots of good wishes my chemo sister.
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u/calamity_unbound 17h ago edited 17h ago
Hair free, care free.
As far as care goes, use a loofah or gentle scrub brush to wash your scalp if you have any kind of dry skin going on, helps to keep it from flaking.
If you plan to be outside for long periods of time, be sure you put sunscreen up there. I forgot to do this when I first started shaving my head and regretted it immensely.
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u/suioppop 17h ago
You blessed you have a nice head shape. Lucky you wonāt be bald for long cause your gonna beat this ššæ
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u/Accomplished-Emu2308 16h ago
Ok but you look stunning. Perfect lips, beautiful eyes, perfect head shape. I am not even kidding
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u/rollingrawhide 16h ago
I have been shot at more than once, yet you are far braver than me for making this post. Best of luck to you for the future.
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u/FreeZucchini5531 16h ago
Woah! Absolutely gorgeous! Sunscreen with a moisturiser ever day before you go out and again middle of the day.
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u/scdemandred 18h ago edited 15h ago
ETA: Thanks for all the awards, but make sure you give em to OP! š„¹