653
u/A_Harmless_Fly 1d ago edited 18h ago
I'll always remember running past a spray on the wall in counterstrike 2 source (players could upload images and put them on walls) It was gimli the dwarf from lotar... but something wasn't quite right.
They had carefully removed his face leaving the beard, and replaced it with goatse.
238
152
u/angrydeuce 1d ago
Oh dude the sprays in cs lol
Literally round a corner, locked in and...face full of cock lol
62
u/dragon_bacon 1d ago
I'm a big fan of the ones in TF2 that will be furry porn from a distance and change to shaming you for looking when you get close.
34
u/Lint_baby_uvulla 1d ago
Still happening, to this day.
Even with bot accounts.
Man’s greatest & longest lasting cultural achievement after our demise & the Terminator Wars will be the persistence of manga cat/femboy sprays.
7
38
58
18
u/bicx 1d ago
I saw another spray that was literally a guy fucking a cat.
10
u/StirFry__InaWok 1d ago
Yeah I'm pretty sure I've seen sprays featuring illegal imagery before in tf2 and l4d2 but I was pretty young at the time so I'd just instantly turn and run away from any sprays that even looked like porn.
6
u/Savs-Pool 1d ago
wait how do you even upload images in cs2
9
u/regimentIV 1d ago
Given the context I am almost certain u/A_Harmless_Fly mixed up CS2 and CS:Source.
6
u/Phototropic- 1d ago
Yeah or even just cs 1.6 or earlier really, pretty much any hl mod!
2
u/regimentIV 22h ago edited 22h ago
Possible but not as likely as Source, given the time period, them calling it "counterstrike 2", and the limited file size and resolution of 1.6/CZ sprays (I doubt anyone could hide Goatse recognizably in Gimli's beard in 256x256 px).
Also unless I am misremembering you couldn't just upload images to CS 1.6 like you could in CS:S but had to concert them to .WAD first.
0
4
u/Mizutsune-Lover 1d ago
What about the transition sprays in TF2? (idk if they had them in CS cause I didn't play).
Hot lady until you walk close and then it changes to the surprise.
1
3
1
117
u/meanblazinlolz 1d ago
1 man, 1 glass jar. The horrors of the internet. Glad he lived
54
u/Mesoscale92 1d ago
I always thought that was the most wholesome shock content of that era.
Bro had a goal (shoving a glass jar up his anus), encountered a setback (the jar shattered), and proceeded to methodically fix the issue (pulling bloodied shards of broken glass from his anus). I don’t think he even screamed much.
50
u/meanblazinlolz 1d ago
He was mostly silent, as family members were awake down stairs, and he had to go to work soon after the video was recorded.
The internet sleuths gave me all the facts I wanted and none of the visual scares I expected.
Whang! Gave me my info:
20
u/octopornopus 1d ago
He sounded more annoyed at the inconvenience of it all. Like "Ugh, this is not what I needed right now..."
388
u/MrWeiner SMBC 1d ago
I'm Zach. I drew the comic. Enjoy our vast distended archive here: www.smbc-comics.com
Now searchable here: https://smbc-search.com/
60
u/scratchy_mcballsy 1d ago
I absolutely love your comics!
36
u/MrWeiner SMBC 1d ago
Thanks :)
13
u/Simon_Drake 1d ago
25 years ago South Park did an episode on how for every topic of discussion ever imaginable, the Simpsons did an episode about it.
But I don't think that's true. I don't think Simpsons did an episode about Goatse. I think the true masterwork of a comedy series that has a joke about everything ever is SMBC. You name it, there's an SMBC comic about it.
There's one about a distopian future where people pay to skip ads so all ads become even more annoying because that's how to make more money. Until the only advert is a flaming baby skull that screams racial slurs until people pay to skip ads. That one is probably coming true sooner than you'd think.
2
u/ParkingNo1080 1d ago
I also loved the YouTube Skits, though I understand how much time and effort they would take to keep making. I still quote a few of them, especially "Both Sides", but "MMO" hit really hard back in the day as my friend was actually addicted to WoW
13
u/ZimGirDibGaz 1d ago
That reminds me, I gotta go finish that immigration book. I love your work man.
26
6
u/ParkingNo1080 1d ago
How many things from "Soonish" are "Nowish"?
8
u/MrWeiner SMBC 1d ago
So far only reusable rockets and some moderate BCI developments. Though the fusion picture has improved substantially thanks to a bunch of VC money (see SPARC).
11
5
u/clarinetJWD 1d ago
I'm a little disappointed both of those links go where you said.
2
u/rlnrlnrln 1d ago
I joined the Internet before the web was really around, and my first thought when seeing the links was "...yeah, right, nice try."
4
1
u/PorcupineWarriorGod 1d ago
Thank you for being one of the actually funny comics on Reddit. I truly enjoy your content.
-2
u/roscoelee 1d ago
If they were describing the early internet how would Wikipedia as an example make any sense?
59
u/Evenfall 1d ago
I remember being being in 6th grade when the internet came out for more public use and early aol and yahoo chat was hopping. Our school offered a summer school class for students of any grade to learn, along with the teachers, all about what you could do on the internet.
There was literally free time where they encouraged us to talk to strangers on the internet. The goal was to see why was the most interesting person you could talk to. Something that would get people fired today! It often devolved into some us creating fake personas and trying to trick others in the class.
It truly was a wild west of sorts. All new territory and we got to be pioneers. Now just in my 40s it sometimes feels like a fevered dream with how controlling the world has become compared to then
12
u/Adabiviak 1d ago
Windows at the time came with Comic Chat (and later V-Chat) where you could pick a server from various regions in the world, pop in, and say hello. Going from landlines where you had to know someone's number (and then pay long-distance charges) to make a call out of the country, being able to engage with people all over the world was mind blowing.
I'd go into foreign ones and say hello. Sometimes they flipped to English for me, and we'd have a chat, sometimes maybe only one person spoke (still had a chat), but occasionally they were outwardly hostile. They wouldn't (couldn't?) kick me out, but they'd ignore me or occasionally throw some slur my way.
Fast forward to today where chatting with anyone around the globe isn't even a second thought, and we got to see the entire world "shrink" somewhat in terms of how distanced other people are over the course of my lifetime. It's still neat to think about.
50
u/praqueviver 1d ago
All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain
21
u/Really_McNamington 1d ago
And with the other pronunciation, tears in the anus.
4
u/atempestdextre 1d ago
"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe, and from this side only! The flight of a half-man, half-bird. Dinosaurs nuzzling their young in pastures where strip-malls should be. Cookies on dowels. All those moments lost in time; gone like eggs off a hooker's stomach. Time to die."
5
308
u/CavemanSlevy 1d ago
A simpler time , when the worst one had to worry about on the internet was getting rickrolled and goatse. Now I get to live with the fear that AI generated disinformation may collapse society. Hurray for progress!
43
u/hambonedock 1d ago
I miss when it was finite too, you could go to your fav site, read everything there and be done for the while
34
46
u/cwal76 1d ago
Bro that’s not early internet lol
71
u/Sotall 1d ago
it's earlier than now
25
14
u/Paige_Railstone 1d ago edited 1d ago
I'm sorry. Would you prefer some dancing baby references, or are you more of a pre
endlessEternal September kind of guy??5
u/TabrinLudd 1d ago
I love to see the reference, but isn’t it called Eternal September?
4
u/Paige_Railstone 1d ago
... yes. Yes it is.
3
31
u/1CEninja 1d ago
Rickroll is modern-ish but goatse was circa ~2000 which is towards the end of what I'd consider "early internet".
3
u/SkollFenrirson 1d ago
Web 2.0 is where I draw the line between early and modern.
14
u/robotical712 1d ago edited 1d ago
Personally, I divide it into three eras: Pre-Web 2.0/.com bust, Web 2.0 to the rise of social media in the early 10’s (it’s surprising how much of a shift there was in a lot of social measurements circa 2012, right when social media usage took off), everything after.
5
u/Chewsti 1d ago
I want to say 2012 was the first year that most people had a smart phone and was really the start of what I think of as the modern internet because of all the shifts that caused. Not just in the sites themselves but the kinds of people on them and the amount of time they spent there.
6
u/Poonchow 1d ago
Mobile taking off was such a huge shift. Suddenly the internet went from a niche thing people occasionally logged into to do specific things, or some enthusiasts were on a lot, to something everyone was connected to 24/7.
2
u/1CEninja 1d ago
Yeah that feels about right to be honest. By the mid 2000's when we 2.0 was mainstream, goatse had largely run its course.
2
u/fragglet 1d ago
Sorry to break it to you bud but next year will be 20 years since rickrolling was invented
9
u/1CEninja 1d ago
I don't consider 2007 to be "early internet". It was a dramatically different time than 1997.
You can make an argument, but I probably don't buy it.
4
u/elizzybeth 1d ago
Right, by 2007 Facebook was already ending the MySpace era, and YouTube had been out for two years. The Vlog Brothers got famous that year.
So very very different from AOL chatrooms, Geocities homepages, Yahoo games, IRC.
1
u/Carlsoti77 1d ago
The OG Rick Roll preceded pop-up blockers. That was how it worked. Each line of the song had it's own window that popped up in a random spot on the screen and you had to click them all closed, one at a time, to get the .exe to stop.
1
u/1CEninja 1d ago
According to Wikipedia, the trend of rickrolling began in 2007.
You might make an argument but I don't really consider 2007 "early internet".
2
u/microthrower 1d ago
It's post YouTube.
That instantly excludes it from early internet. Early YouTube, sure.
0
u/GameDesignerDude 1d ago
Rickroll is probably second generation internet really, since it would be post-YouTube which really defined the start of a new era I think.
YTMND is maybe another example of (more friendly) early internet linking tricks.
15
21
u/TapZorRTwice 1d ago
You mean that wasnt your early internet.
But for everyone that grew up on windows xp, it most definitely was.
11
2
u/Bubbaluke 1d ago
https://youtu.be/3d1phCytJyg?is=2KTf6eKleid2we3y
Look, someone made a comedy sketch about you
1
2
u/unfriendzoned 1d ago
Back in the day you would get an email from a friend, click on a link and see the worst thing of your life and just shrug your shoulders and say, well you got me.
1
u/DanKoloff 1d ago
In my early days I didn't fear neither since 512kb pictures of naked women loaded for a few minutes. Once top few rows presented themselves my mind would play "complete" the picture before I actually see the end picture often to my great disappontment.
21
u/Moppo_ 1d ago
That spirit is still alive out there. I was in Frankfurt last summer, and someone had put a sticker that was just a picture of an anus on a lamppost.
4
1
1
u/JMAN7102 23h ago
All the butthole stickers I find at concerts and festivals confirm this is still alive.
9
u/phxrocker 1d ago
They told me it was a Magic Eye...
5
1
9
7
14
7
u/TechnicallyCant5083 1d ago
Unfortunately modern day Wikipedia is a propaganda warzone so this statement doesn't really fit
2
u/HeyBitchImAccursed 1d ago
How so? I'm out of the loop here. I haven't used that website in years.
7
u/TechnicallyCant5083 1d ago
Any topic related to wars or politics or even countries are basically an editing warzone. Many editors fight to put their own political views into the articles, with many countries pouring vast amounts of resources to have their propaganda immortalized as "the objective truth" on Wikipedia. Wikipedia was supposed to be objective and neutral but that is long gone. A classic example would be the discussion page on the "Zionism" article, but any other discussion page on recent events would also be a good example.
And even on non-political articles like animals and plants, "senior" editors have massive ego issues and would reject edits from newer editors for bullshit reasons just to have dick measuring contests.
3
6
12
u/neroselene 1d ago
I miss the early internet. It was simpler, and we didn't have the puritanical weirdo's being listened to.
33
u/YellowOnline 1d ago
That's not early internet imho. That was already internet 2.0. The early internet didn't have much pictures except an "under construction" gif
36
u/CaptainApathy419 1d ago
Have we forgotten Hampster Dance and Flying Toasters?
Tears in the rain…
13
10
u/subwooferofthehose 1d ago
Badger badger badger badger
Badger badger badger badger
Badger badger badger badger
Badger badger badger badger
Mushroom! Mushroom!
2
4
u/Sankofa416 1d ago
I heard Hamster Dance playing in the far distance as I read the name. Kind of creepy, but I appreciate it not jumping into my head at full volume.
7
u/Parrotcap 1d ago
My earliest internet was composed of blocky Geocities sites with animated tiled backgrounds and visitor counters. Most of the sites were about Petz.
5
u/Malt129 1d ago
Early internet was chatrooms
11
1
1
7
3
u/FancyFeller 1d ago
2006 me having fun on chatrooms, but also being traumatized by hyperlinks to lemon party, tub girl, 2g1c etc etc. my 11 year old mind was forever altered and desensitized. I don't agree with censoring the Internet and needing your ID to access adult sites is bunk. But also as a teenager who was on LiveLeaks seeing Chinese factory accidents and cartel torture/execution videos. I can definitely tell you I would've been better off never seeing any of that.
3
u/cwal76 1d ago
It was always porn. Even early internet. I remember downloading pics of scantily clad girls off bbs
2
u/hapnstat 1d ago
I remember downloading them from MILNET. Good times, you could get into damn near anything.
2
2
u/Carlsoti77 1d ago edited 1d ago
Ahhh, the Rick-Roll of the retina. Long live Kirk J. EDIT: Also, you all missed out on stuff like the mud-shrimp story, and other horrifc stuff that will never be equaled. (thankfully.)
2
u/unexistingpromise 1d ago
miss the old internet so much. Feeds just guess your clicks now instead of letting you actually explore.
2
2
2
2
1
u/bowserusc 1d ago
I clicked through to the main website once to get rid of it as quickly as possible. It was instructions about how to have sex with a dolphin.
1
u/Cimmerian_Barbarian 1d ago
For my two cents...I would totally be happy with 1997 tech. DSL internet, email and my StarTac phone. I'm good.
1
u/imeme1969 1d ago
Man it must have been tough being a computer in the early 2000’s hey,
1
u/deus_deceptor 1d ago
It was fun being tech savvy back then, having to run around troubleshooting your neighbours and relatives computers all the time.
People just installed whatever shady ass search bar they came across.
1
u/deuce-loosely 1d ago
We used to set our friends desktop wallpaper to scat pics when they weren't in the room to let them come back and later when they'd get on their pc discover them.
1
u/Mrheadcrab123 1d ago
I’m still trying to figure out where in all dogs go to heaven 2 dose Gordon Freeman die
1
1
u/SittingEames 1d ago
You know this was a particularly cruel description for those of us with the inability to forget images.
1
1
1
u/MsnthrpcNthrpd 1d ago
Tripod, Geocities, and Angelfire free internet pages. Everyone wanted their own page.
Guestbooks, web rings, and forums for finding new pages.
IRC was where you could find all kinds of early hackers and spoofers. Some random dude showed me how to spoof 1-800-FLOWERS emails and sent random "You're Fired" emails from the CEO.
Yahoo! Chatrooms were a huge fad, custom rooms and all sorts of general chats. I remember roleplaying Wrestling and Sailor Moon fan chatrooms being wild.
1
1
u/angelicblossomy 1d ago
Kids today will never understand the risk of clicking a random link someone sent you in 2007
1
1
u/tree_squid 1d ago
Man, I made so many people look at that thing. I was in an IRC channel, Internet Relay Chat for all you youngsters, with an on-join message that told you what things you were prohibited from begging for, first thing when you joined the chat. If you joined and immediately asked for something you were specifically told not to, you got the anus.
1
u/IntoTheCrimson 1d ago
Hah. I remember gamefaqs, LUE, and the unholy trinity. What a time that was.
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/tacularcrap 23h ago edited 23h ago
progressive JPEG.
progressive JPEG and a 56k modem almost saved me from seeing Catherine Ringer boldly arcing over a man to defecate into his mouth in a "random" newsgroup.
oh that's Catherine. why is she... [frantic mechanical mouse movement].
1
1
1
u/Monkfich 21h ago
It’s not quite the same, but I remember “us” uploading a friend waving around a, ahem, dildo, and using spray painting grafitti tags with that in the original Jet Set Radio on Dreamcast. I don’t even remember anymore how “we” got the pic uploaded.
1
u/thundastruck69 15h ago
"Oh look a mason jar on a towel how bad cou-No nope nope nope nope nope! I'll watch something else something positive! ✨️ oh look! Two teens are gonna help that homeless guy build a shelter in the woods!"
1
0
•
u/AutoModerator 1d ago
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.